KTM boycott announced by auto journos



BANGALORE: In a surprising move, all major automotive journalists today announced that they’ll boycott any future KTM motorcycle launch events, unless KTM promises to hold them exclusively at the Buddh International Circuit.

This comes in the aftermath of the 390 Adventure launch, held at a rugged off-road venue near Pune, 19-Degree North. Embarrassing leaked videos of the reviewers crashing willy-nilly into the surrounding bushes is thought to be the reason for this extraordinary decision.

When asked for comment, Mr. Mody had this to say:

Look, this is all KTM’s fault. Why the hell did they send us to that hellhole to test this motorcycle? Not only did they have the balls to imagine that we could actually ride a bike off-road, they even brought in a bloody “expert” from Australia to make us look even worse.

I mean if all of us desi people had been crashing together, unable to climb halfway up a slight incline, it would’ve been just like old times. But to then allow us to be mocked by a foreigner, who later posts the whole fucking thing on Youtube? That is unacceptable, and KTM needs to be taught a lesson.

Mr. Chatterjee added to the above:

This is like my 9th grade Science exam all over again, the whole KTM event was like an out of syllabus question paper. I mean sure I’m paid to ride motorcycles, but that doesn’t mean I have to put in any efforts to develop the skills that’ll help me do my job properly, right? It’s all just plain ridiculous.

We have given the ultimatum to KTM, we don’t particularly give a shit what you’re launching, if you want us to review it, take us to the Buddh Circuit. We know that place well, there are no steep rocky sections to deal with, and it’s very easy to take a wheelie photo that makes it look like I actually know what I’m doing.

To get the other side of the story, we reached out to KTM for a few words:

We clearly overestimated the abilities of these guys, didn’t we? On the day of the event, one of the journalists came to me and asked, and I’m not joking here, “Why is it called 390 Adventure when it’s actually supposed to be an enduro bike?”. I had to spend 45 minutes trying to explain to him what an enduro bike was, that this wasn’t an enduro bike, and nobody had claimed it was so.

While they were being stretchered off the trail to the nearest hospital, most of them kept babbling about spoked wheels and adjustable suspension, that they would’ve made it to the top if only the gearing was slightly shorter, and gravity slightly lower. It was painful to watch them try to handle rocky sections while sitting on the seat, no wonder so many of them blacked out after hitting their testicles on the tank too many times.

The 390 Adventure was launched with a suite of electronic and mechanical features, including traction control, cornering ABS, ride by wire, and a quickshifter.

On one side in the sharply divided biking community, there are people who believe all these features are unnecessary, and KTM should’ve improved other items instead. On the other, there are people who’ve already bought the 390 Adv, and are trying to ride as far away as possible from the first kind.

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  1. Adhip Varma

    AK rising from the ashes….. you’re the best blogger….it would have been great if you would have mocked some self-proclaimed ‘reviewers’ who are being a critic of the bike Adv 390 without even riding it 😂

    1. Anonymous

      I guess you are talking about “Chuddiieeesss” 😂

      1. Adhip Varma

        Yes you are correct……the way the trend is going…a day is not far when they will start reviewing jet planes and their blind followers will amplify the level of stupidity 😂😂😂😂

  2. Savio T

    You’re alive!

    1. Rohan

      And, you have just started once again. Welcome!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. vivek singh

    Only idiots believe they should be paid for the job they dont know..

  4. Daddy's Little Girl

    Baap of all blogs!

  5. Ashish

    Welcome back !

  6. Jack

    If u bring godi media then they will talk nonsensee let it be politics or bike. Ktm shld ask these media ppl what u know abt dakar and ktm wen they can talk abt it then ktm shld bring them for test ride
    It was test ride for ktm and testical ride for media

  7. Duke of Lower Parel

    Hahahha….I agree, and then there are Youtubers making videos like ‘Critical Analysis of Adventure 390’ without even getting anywhere close to the bike. Most journos have lost their respect that I had for them after seeing their reviews.

  8. Johnny Bravo

    Bike cos should review auto journos before calling them. All auto journos should hold a license for the job their supposed to know how to do. That license should have categories.. cruisers, adv, tourers, etc !!

  9. Sumesh Reddiar

    Lol.. it’s definitely not a sissy tarmac journo’s walk on the cake when it comes to off-road riding they need to learn positions and handling for that they definitely need to have practice, neither they have that skill nor they do a thorough revision irrespective of accent/language/grooming. looking at Enduro rider Adam Reimann their ego might have hurt..
    They not even know the difference between Adventure tourer/Dual sports and Enduro motorcycle..pitty on them.. hey Bagwan..please save the Auto media 🙏
    Anyways let those crib.. we are glad that off-road cult is kicking off..

    (This comment is applicable to those sissy tarmac journos not to those who did decent offroad infact saw many did a kickass showoff in YouTube cahnnel )

    From a rider who is just a learner who likes dirt most 😎

  10. Neeraj Samarth

    Clearly they did not invite the national championship winner and cross country rally winner on the KTM . Totally ignored the loyal customers and went for media riders !! Well – they r right in what they said .. totally ..riders rider n they watch n write what they see n get the feedback from riders !! Still surprised that achieving on ktm 390 over years now n just dont feel right !! KTM has the right culture but someone desi is spoiling it !! Time to get adapted and look forward KTM india !! Encourage the riders !!

  11. Arushi Saxena

    Fantastic piece……….👌

  12. Ankur Vijay Sachan

    Hi my name is Ankur Vijay Sachan, I am 35, 5’8” & own a benelli trk 502x, with a seat height of 840 mm and 250 kgs weight with fuel.
    KTM has always been a future oriented model. The looks which it has in that segment are amazing. Here I would like to say most of the bikers today think that they are the most expert reviewers of the world.

    They just buy the bike and think they can handle any terrain, whereas off-roading is far far a different aspect than the normal tarmac. Most of them I am sure would not even know the minor details of how to ride a 850mm 390 even on tarmac.

    Off roading is about freeing your body and mind, getting light over the bike and be very flexible. I wanna know how many of them were even fit to handle the adv??. Flexibility is very important and most important is how you maintain the balance at 1kmph -3kmph over the boulders. Stiffness wont work. And yes experience is must.

    I have an experience of 17 years and dont know how many times I have been to the dangerous roads of Northern Himalayas, Recently went to Sikkim(chowpta valley kala patthar)from Bangalore by TRK502x in dec 2019. I m afraid but I think these cribbers should go and check the off roading there at a height of 14k feets.

    Next time you want somebody for the review, DO CONTACT ME

  13. Ronnie

    If u cant ride its ur fault

  14. Wastedinhell

    Bunch of idiots who think they can review these bikes. Fake ass idiots who wants to test the adventure 390 in buddh circuit.

    KTM should boycott these ahabs. Open this review to actual owners and riders of Adventure bikes of other brands.

    All these Auto Journos are bunch of pussies who see Rossi riding the Yamaha R1M and try to find ways to write what rossi says as their own comments.

  15. Wastedinhell

    Auto Journos are the biggest joke of this country. They want to test Adventure in Buddh. LOL.. They will want to test an Army Tank in Air port run way because thats the only way they know to even ride. AKA – Straight line.

    It was funny to see these so called riders biting dust and the so called forigner thinking, how are these jokers even getting paid to ride this.

    If at all, KTM should boycott these jokers.

    KTM What works for you is Orange days, actual owners and word of mouth. YOu do not need auto journals.

    The journals are costly and no one buys it or even reads it.

  16. Vishnu

    Missed you brother… And just unbelievably awesome timing for a comeback

  17. Fakenewsnetwork

    We need a YouTube version of this.

  18. Abhishek Ilke

    I missed you bro, we are really devoid of quality content and roasts here, please never go AWOL.

  19. GolakaGo

    Hahahahhahahahhahahahaha what a bunch o sissies!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 have a look at their Ig account. They look like they can handle anything and everything thrown at them. Making bold statements and claims. And now, when the real picture is shown and their mediocre skills are at risk, they want to boycott other KTM launches. Its good. Let them do so and let them fade away. Only then will other capable riders and reviewers come to the fore. We dont need posers. Thank you KTM for exposing these bunch of wannabes.

  20. Vipin

    Ktm made a mistake by calling youtubers. They should be calling some indian motocross riders

  21. Adalarasan

    If you know how to ride a bike and you feel comfortable while you do test ride book it buy it if not go for other bike or other brand

  22. Orgy

    Brilliant humor, although people aren’t getting it, thinking this is real news…

  23. Aditya K

    Welcome back Akhil! Missed you and your acerbic wit!!

  24. Journeykanth

    Dude, you are alive and kickin’… Literaly!!

  25. Sudhir

    This is nothing! Wait for the video reviews with the slow motion and insane music while they do a voiceover like they are running behind a train they missed.

  26. Sitaram PR

    Lol!! I was awaiting an article on this fiasco. My take is that while some are not bad, the pressure of keeping up with Adam got to them. Of course there were others who were as confused as a baby in a topless bar !! Moreover Adam was rubbing salt into the wounds “who wants to do it once again ”
    I might have been in the same situation as the journos but then…they are supposed to be auto experts who review for a living.

  27. whateva

    Nice piece. This will have KTM chuckling away and will serve the reverse purpose, should any of the chickens who didn’t want to go up and around he hill again think about issuing a boycott call.

  28. Tomson

    Wait.. is the really a YouTube video..??? Would love to see that…

  29. pegyal knows nothing

    being a motorcycle journalist
    one should know what he is writing or reviewing about
    no doubt the coarse was a bit rough for the media but i personally feel being on this field one should know what theyre getting themselves into.
    seems the media didnt read the itinerary properly?lol
    its quite shameful for us because just compare us to medias or vloggers like motorcycle.com 44teeth fortnine ridingwithtom etc
    they have better roads than us but can still anyday deliver
    just a thought 🙂

  30. Akshay Menon

    Welcome back! I missed the satire and cuss words. You and Tushar burman should Collab, a podcast or something, it would be epic!

    1. AK

      He’s an actual journalist, and I hate podcasts 🙂

  31. Anubhav Pattnaik

    I saw the movie from Adam and now all your comments and suggestions. End of the day a major part of buyers going to use this for touring purpose apart from off-roading and daily commute. We all see we need enough skill to excel on an offroad-trail then tarmac roads. It always preferred to listen from a person who every day wakes up to riding and has adventure and enduro riding experience and yes the guy should have a good name in riding society and yes social media as well.

  32. Rohith

    Please add a mailing list for new posts.

    1. AK

      Fact is that I’m just very lazy. This is the simplest website I could create, 1 single plugin, that’s it. Can’t be arsed to do a newsletter.