I like to think of myself as a biker, but there are very few things that I truly understand about the culture. I get why people want to go around the world on their little scooties, I get why people spend time, money and balls to get their knee down on the track, I get why people spend years practicing their skills to master the dirt. As far as the rest goes, I have no fucking clue.
I’ve been to the India Bike Week, two times. From what I understand, it exactly like Rider Mania, just less Bullets and more beer. All of these biker festivals look like organised binge parties to me, where people too scared of drinking in front of their families get together to share their sorrows. I don’t get that.
What I also don’t get is Loudest Bike Competitions, I simply don’t understand the point. I love loud bikes, but the sweet kind, like Daytona with an Arrow. What I absolutely detest are these cocksuckers redlining their machines like it’s a fucking talent show. Try shouting at the top of your throat for 15 minutes straight and then tell me how you feel. Or if you’d prefer, as I’m sure you would, ask your butt buddy to shove his dick down your throat and give you a good face fuck for an hour or so. That should tell you.
Look at these whores, just look at them. At the end of the show, the lady said, almost proudly, “I think I’ve gone deaf”. What the fuck woman? That’s a medical condition you should go and get checked, not something funny to laugh and joke about.
Unfortunately, sometimes these dick waving contests don’t end so well for the bikes. Take a look at this video to see what I mean. The biggest mystery for me is about the people who stand around and cheer such asswads. Either they genuinely enjoy that wailing, horrid sound of a motorcycle being molested, or the genuinely enjoy watching the owner make a fool of himself.
Thanks to Ogden Fernandes for capturing such precious moments. He is the ONLY MotoVlogger that I understand, and whose channel I think makes some sense. I’ve been planning for a while to start my own channel, even made a video that I found to be too shitty so didn’t upload.
Never say never.